So, this happened. Long story short, I’m the Tooth Fairy.

And I look a-m-a-z-I-n-g in wings & a taffeta gown.

Smoked top sirloin steak with white kidney bean, green olive, & artichoke salad and spaghetti with just sea salt & local olive oil.

I’m in love with my new ultrathin Bordeaux wineglasses.

Also a little bit of an alcoholic, I suppose.

Shuddup.
almostfancy asked:
Why do the gills have to be removed from portobella mushrooms? I tried to remove the gills from some today, and I ended up breaking apart all the mushrooms and I had to throw them away. This made me sad.

I’ve never removed the gills. I like them.

  • First of all, they’re tasty like… well, mushroom.
  • Second, they really sponge up the marinade.

Removing the gills is likely one of those things insisted upon by people who refuse to wash mushrooms but rather just dust them & end up eating pasteurized cow poop confusing literally every rung of the food chain.

I hate people like that.

I also hate people who unnecessarily insert the word “literally”. (Do what I say, not what I do.)

So, leave the gills and enjoy the mushrooms completely.

Also, wash off the poop.

Ok, not sure if you can make this out but it’s grilled open-faced with the cheese “topping” directly on the pan surface so it crusts. With the smoked meat & olives, peppers, & garlic, the aroma is crippling. Gotta go now. #food (Taken with instagram)

Aaaaand here we go! #food (Taken with instagram)

I minced up some olive, pepper, & garlic antipasto and fried some of last weekend’s smoked pork shoulder. I’ve gotta admit I’m not sure where I’m going with this. Probably add red & yellow peppers and make cheesesteak sammiches out of this. #food #experiments (Taken with instagram)

THIS is the correct proportion of artichoke to risotto in artichoke risotto. Anything less and the chef’s a cheapskate. #food (Taken with instagram)

Artichoke-Romano risotto with smoked grilled chicken & fresh veggies. #food (Taken with instagram)

These blackberries are bigger than testicles




…is a thought I can no longer unthink.





Shit. Now I don’t want these blackberries in my mouth.

Queen? Yeah, I’d pretty much have to be. (Taken with instagram)

Sad pho face. (Taken with instagram)

Did you know that Optimus Prime has his own line of fishing gear? Makes sense. (Taken with instagram)

He refuses to use the slide correctly.

Or… innovation rarely follows the rules.

Whatevs.

You don’t need a big yard when you live next door to a park.

The difference is who works on the landscaping.
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